In the four years we have been doing this, at Comfi we have often wondered about the history of bed sharing. Like, whose idea was it? Because if you had to stop and really think about it, it almost seems ludicrous. Maybe back in the day, when the lack of quality sleep didn’t really impact us as much (and we were in that complete honeymoon phase with our other half) we didn’t think about it much. Now as many of us approach middle age, we would be happy to sell a child for a night of good quality sleep. And things that didn’t annoy us when sharing our bed before, now become really big things that do. So, with the approach of Valentine’s Day, we thought we would look into some common sleep issues that couples experience and some tips on how to deal with them. Spoiler alert: we do not address getting rid of the partner.
The Snorer
Without a doubt, the most common sleep issue between two people sharing the same bed. What is even more frustrating is it is generally the non-snorer who has the most disrupted sleep. For those of us non-snorers, do you feel like you are in a torture chamber and a weird kind of primal “how can I kill you” thought pattern appears?
What to do: For some relief, the snorer can try avoiding alcohol in the evenings, sleeping on their side, or elevating their head at night with lots of pillows. We have a 10pm curfew in our house - arriving home after that? Sorry buddy, you’re in another room. For the non-snorer, try white or ocean noise or earplugs (Loop earplugs seem to be a winner here). But, whilst occasional snoring may be inconvenient, heavy, consistent snoring may be signs of some health issues and should be addressed by a health professional so get yourself checked out if this may be you.
The Too-Hot Sleeper
This one comes in as the second most common sleep issue between couples. One likes to sleep with just a sheet in the middle of winter, one goes to bed dressed like a Michelin man. One likes all the windows open, one doesn’t. And so it goes on.
What to do: when it comes to temperature, the biggest solution is compromise. Try different bedding options like each of you having your own duvet (the Europeans do this) or cooling mattress protectors. Another thing you can do is ensure you have a mattress that maximises air flow right from the bed base to the layer closest to your skin. We won’t keep you guessing which mattress company ensures each mattress in their range is 100% designed specifically to maximise air flow and temperature regulation. In all our time here at Comfi, we have NEVER had a complaint that our mattresses are too hot. And finally, a solution that actually addresses lots of issues when it comes to couples sharing, is to have two king singles pushed together. That way, each person can go for their lives when it comes to creating the sleep sanctuary that works best for them.
The Sheet Stealer
You know it. The frequent scenario where one person wakes up freezing cold only to look over at their partner who is cuddled up sleeping like a baby with all the bedding.
What to do: the solutions raised previously can completely translate across to this scenario to negate sheet stealer situations. Different bedding and/or separate beds pushed together will nip this one in the bud.
The Firm Sleeper vs The Plush Sleeper
Yowsers. If we had a dollar for every time we heard this scenario. It goes back to this almost somewhat ludicrous idea of two very different people sharing a bed. Whose idea was that again? And how on earth do you sort this one out?
What to do: there are a couple of solutions here and most importantly, it comes down to compromise. Comfi has simplified the feels down to 3 - firm, medium and soft. Our medium feel is definitely what we call the “Goldilocks” one where it appears to be the most successful solution for the firm vs plush sleeper to reach a good compromise. Again, the other solution (which we sell a lot of) is to have 2 king singles pushed together in different feels. If you aren’t in the hot vs cold or sheet stealer categories, some couples put a California king mattress protector over the two kings singles so it feels like a big bed. It’s just each of you gets exactly the feel that you want. Happy days!
The Early Bird vs The Night Owl
This is a tough one as your sleep chronotype is generally built into your DNA. Some of you can bounce at 6am and some of you need to be dragged out of bed with caffeine being a life saving requirement before you even start your day.
What to do: Instead of attempting to change an early bird or a night owl, try different ways to reduce sleep distractions from mismatched sleep schedules. Move the night owl’s toothbrush to the guest bathroom. Fix the squeaky bedroom door. Ask the early bird to leave their exercise gear outside the bedroom. And definitely make sure you have a mattress with as minimal partner disturbance as possible. Oh yes, that’s us here at Comfi again! And finally, if it is really impacting your sleep, you can opt for different bedrooms. After all, a well-rested partner is far better to be around than a grumpy one. Just ask our husbands.
The Restless Sleeper
You will certainly know if you have one of these or are one yourself. When you wake up in the morning, one side of the bed requires a quick flick to straighten the bedding. The other side looks like a tornado has ripped through it.
What to do: You need to ensure you have a mattress that minimises partner disturbance. Look for ones that have individual pocket springs made of good quality steel and are thick in their structure. Mmmm, now which company could provide that kind of mattress?? A continuous coil spring system is not conducive to restless sleepers so make sure you do your research. And yes, another way to tackle this issue is to have two separate mattresses pushed together. That way, you’ll never have to feel your partner again.
So just remember, incompatible sleepers does not mean incompatible partners. As sleep is a biological need, not a luxury, do everything you can to ensure you maximise those benefits.
From the Comfi Sleep Experts,
Vicki and Susie